Quarterfinals – 2018

Tuesday 7:20 PM
Troopers vs Scoundrels
1 FINAL 6
Tuesday 8:55 PM
Hunters vs Imperials
4 FINAL 1
Tuesday 10:30 PM
Sith vs Jedi
7 FINAL 3
Wednesday 9:00 PM
Raiders vs Hutts
0 FINAL 5


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hokey Boob
hokey Boob
5 years ago

Scoundrels 6-4
Imperials 5-3
Jedi 3-2

the lonely wednesday night game is perfect since no one even knew those teams were in the league anyway

George Jeff
George Jeff
5 years ago

Troopers
Hunters
Jedi
Hutts

movin’ on up

Real Donald Trump Twitter
Real Donald Trump Twitter
5 years ago

Listen up 5’s a 10 is talking! Ok weaklings , i went 2 for 2 last night…well 3 for 3 if you count making The Little Rocketman my bitch so here comes the Orange Emperors 2nd night picks.
Troopers 7-Scoundrels 5
Troopers have a better goalie and are all warmed up from putting whoopin’ on the Frain train last night. Expect the Commish to weep like that pussy Rodman did last night upon taking defeat…Sad!! Just because the pinheads on fake news CNN are talking about denuclearizing expect Evil Flood to drop a nuclear elbow in Laux’s face ending his evening early.

Hunters 3-Imperials 2
Too much sockless goalie and Hunter Tryhards but this one could go either way admittedly. Ill hook the winner of this one up with my daughter Tiffany. No one knows what she does anyways so im sure she wouldn’t mind a little action. But , yea…Hunters.

Sith 5-Jedi 3
Too much old time experience on Sith . plus i like that the one guys wears Jean shorts…reminds me of someone you’d see at one of my rallies. In fact i expect the Sith to beat up on little Joey P like they beat up protesters at my rallies…”get em out of here”! Until tomorrow-The Donald

Tillerson
Tillerson
5 years ago

It’s pretty insensitive scheduling the Scoundrels so close to the early bird.

The Penguin
The Penguin
5 years ago

My boys win it all!

Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
5 years ago

The Donald making hockey predictions is like having Mr. Rogers judge the AVN awards. SAD!

Lord Helmet
Lord Helmet
5 years ago

Shout out to some of our notable 4th period improvements this year:
– Laux has been hitting the stands and the tequila way harder than last.
– Nude Pissington managed to keep it in his pants (minus), but I’ve seen him outright win 3 different 4th periods this year, and a goon suspension to boot (plus)! MVP candidate.
– Mike Gillespie (Raiders) and Elefant (Hunters) were one-man-bands most nights, but they found beer when their teammates brought none.
– Jorts + Shit = ….Shorts?

Predictions:
Scoundrels 8, Troopers 4 – Troopers score some garbage-time goals after Anus approves the addition of a 2nd Aubrey to their lineup during the 3rd period.

Imperials 6, Hunters 2 – the Imperials’ bullshit “C” guy who looks like Sunshine from Remember the Titans provides too much depth for the Tieboys to handle

Sith vs Jedi – RECUSED!!! Sorry Trump! I predict Clearly will play with his 7-iron

Hutts 7, Raiders 3 – Heavy D, suddenly the WSL Adam Oates, has a big game and threatens to backcheck during several shifts

Deaner
Deaner
5 years ago

I’m too old and too drunk to know if I did this right. But I love this. I miss this. It matters to me in the long term. Thanks for competing with and against me. It matters so much:. Soundtrack “into the wild.” You’re all great hockey players. I’m proud of what this is… even as I leave my minivan to be picked up tomorrow. See you in the fall after you accept your defeat to th e scoundrels.

Greedo
Greedo
5 years ago
Reply to  Deaner

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeean!

Wait a second...
Wait a second...
5 years ago

Did Dean just get gay?

scoundrel lives matter
scoundrel lives matter
5 years ago

so gay

Lord Helmet
Lord Helmet
5 years ago

No, just wasted! They do sound very similar. Since Flood is busy getting his beauty rest, the real scores were:
4-1 Hunters (or maybe 3-1)
7-3 Sith

hokey Boob
hokey Boob
5 years ago

and we miss happy Dean at 2:00AM

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago

Can someone forward “Earmuffs'” contact info to Jenkins? He may need a helmet upgrade.

Greedo
Greedo
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

Earmuffs may want to wear a cage – and hit the gym.

Earmuffs
Earmuffs
5 years ago
Reply to  Greedo

I can’t hear you over Bruce’s whistle.

Jenks
Jenks
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

What? Speak up, I can’t hear you.

Lord Helmet
Lord Helmet
5 years ago
Reply to  Jenks

Captain Jenks is alive! The Scoundrels picked the wrong night to play Mutant League Hockey

Tillerson
Tillerson
5 years ago
Reply to  Jenks

Eddleman would have duct taped that bad boy on and finished the game.

Real Donald Trump Twitter
Real Donald Trump Twitter
5 years ago

Hutts vs Raiders

Listen up lightweights!! The Donald goes 2 for 3 again last night including picking the Hunters upset and the downfall of the Laux. No other world leader but Trump could pick mens league outcomes so bigly!! Speaking of the Eddlemonkey…i remember a time before he hiked up Brokeback mountain and never came back down that i might have like his League of Extraordinarily Retarted Gentleman to pull one out tonight but those days are in the past, and their little friend Parkin also tore his outer labia when some hipster ran him over…weak!!! Youth prevails and the Raiders are old…5-3 Hutts. Gotta go, Kerryanne just brought over a bucket of KFC and Judge Judy is coming on. Until next time-The Donald

Jabba the Butt
Jabba the Butt
5 years ago

I predict you will be hearing this a lot tonight and throughout the playoffs, every time the Hutts score:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPcod8IS214

Time to release the Rancor!

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago

Does livebarn have closed captioning for Jenkins? Just wondering.

DD

Spicoli
Spicoli
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

Woah…….Gnarley!!!!!

W. Sobchak
W. Sobchak
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

You want an ear? I can get you an ear, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don’t wanna know about it, believe me. These f*cking amateurs…

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago

If the Hutts weren’t total faggots they would have a Princess Leia slave girl instead of a clip of Gibbons sitting on a throne eating frogs & shit. Your days as viable contenders for the cup are numbered – so bring us slave girls!
PS – If I recollect, Jabba actually DID do closed captioning before it was a PC mandate (Jenkins).

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

JENKINS’ EAR, WAR OF (1739–1742). The War of Jenkins’ Ear, an armed conflict between Britain and Spain, arose from longstanding Anglo-Spanish antagonism fostered by illicit British trading activities in the Spanish Caribbean and the determined, often brutal, attempts by Spain’s colonial guarda costa (‘coast guard’) vessels to suppress such ventures. Popular feeling, incited by opponents of the Walpole ministry in London and a vigorous merchant lobby opposed to diplomatic efforts, further intensified pressures conducive to war.

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

Who would have thought a nub of useless cartilage could start an international incident of historical significance?

Mike Tyson
Mike Tyson
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn

I like Earthes. Fuck you Holyfield. I’ll eatch your childwen. You thuck Bruuth

Jenks
Jenks
5 years ago
Reply to  Dickie Dunn
Tillerson
Tillerson
5 years ago
Reply to  Jenks

I just assumed that Dickie was insane.

Lord Helmet
Lord Helmet
5 years ago
Reply to  Tillerson

Dear God, and the article references the Oglethorpe Regiment! Real cement-head!!!

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago
Reply to  Jabba

That’s more like it Jabba – and no we will not accept one of your players dressed as a slave girl.

Business Casual Fan
Business Casual Fan
5 years ago

The peanut gallery needs to know, what happen to Jenks ?🤷🏻‍♂️

St. Peter
St. Peter
5 years ago

He tried to arrest Jesus so I got him with my sword

Business Casual Fan
Business Casual Fan
5 years ago
Reply to  St. Peter

Guess I’ll just wait until Saturday to ask a real person rather than a Wissahickon wise guy.

Lord Helmet
Lord Helmet
5 years ago

Apparently Kelchner had part of his mask broken on Monday, and legend has it that Evil Flood knocked Jenkins into Kelchner on Tuesday, wherein our hero got his ear caught in the mask and damn near split it in two. I saw the photos, and they are gnarly. Early word is that Kelchner will use his mask to perform an on-ice bris during the relegation round.

Business Casual Fan
Business Casual Fan
5 years ago
Reply to  Lord Helmet

I retract my prior statement. All hail BWH.

Artooo
Artooo
5 years ago
Reply to  Lord Helmet

Mazel Tov!

Charles Shultz
Charles Shultz
5 years ago

Scoundrels vs. Sith at 9:15 am. that sounds like a win / win situation for the Hecklers ; Peanut Gallery. The loser is going to lubed up and ready for the championship like never seen before. Good luck to the final 4whores.

Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
5 years ago

Where’s the Commie prognosticator when you need him?

Answer: probably strogan-off

(Russian joke)

Jorts
Jorts
5 years ago

Whipping up some Goo- Losh ?

Real Donald Trump Twitter
Real Donald Trump Twitter
5 years ago

Ok weaklings listen up, the Donald called another one. Lets move onto new business…

Scoundrels-Sith
Laux has an old man injury …weak!! Jenkins has blood coming out of his wherever. . .pathetic!! Sith has an edge in goaltending…and some real veterans that have been there before. The Donald calls it for Sith. 5-4

Hutts-Hunters
Get these weak Hunters flunkies outta here. He without socks can’t keep this dead team alive anymore….it reminds me of Weekend at Bernies. That’s one of my favorite movies, Kellyanne had a screening of it for me and General Kelly the other night in the presidential movie theatre catered by KFC. It was pretty cool. Anyway Hutts biggly 7-2!!

Hutts-Sith
Tough one, really could go either way but remember when i said youth prevails? Whos older , Shoup and BWH or Mike D and his new girlfriend Nealis? Hutts 5-4(ot) Lock it up…The Donald out!

Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
Beer Drinking Watcher Guy
5 years ago

All this time I was looking for the Ruskie and this orange man with a comb-over answers my call. Is it possible that the real DT was the Russian typing tough guy all along?

What do we have like, Facebook level security around here?

What is going on back there?

Dickie Dunn
Dickie Dunn
5 years ago

My crystal ball is cloudy on predictions but I can say I will be getting as fucked up as Dean was Tuesday. Hopefully without the turning gay part.

Crosby
Crosby
5 years ago

No box scores? Weak